i dunno wat to do... i dunno wat to do... maybe i shall just punch myself or drop a vase on my head so i will forget eveything. yes, knock me unconscious. i dun even wanna sleep. when i start to sleep i have nightmares. this is so damn scary. now i dun dare to sleep. i dreamt that in my dream i dream that i cant wake up then i woke up and tried to wake up but cannot.so ya i am struggling in my sleep. then the other night i dreamt some disgusting shit that i dun wanan say here but its gross. so i am so afraid to sleep now cause i have nightmares so often nowadays i dunno what is the god damn problem with me. help!!! so now i have weird sleeping timings. i sleep more than i used to, maybe more than 10 hrs a day cause my mind is not resting when its supposed to. therefore i get tired very fast. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. i need to really sleep. i dun welcome dreams unless its andy roddick talking to me. that one i will not mind. haha. i dunno. i dunno. i dunno. i dunno why i am feelin that way. why i am rejecting everything. it seems so hard to totally get over something. i thought it did not bother me at all. i didnt even know it even bothered me. but now i know, it is the cause of everything. i unknowningly let it affect me. i guess i am still frightened by the incident. i need time.
Ange
5:29 pm
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