Was talking to a friend last night, and it magnified the naggy feeling in me for a long time that human relationships are indeed very complicated. I am not even referring to couple kind of relationship, just normal friendships. It makes me wonder what holds people together that make them stay together as friends. How do we even define who our friends are. I face strained friendships because I feel that I have been made use of, or that I mean little to you. Some people make me feel very uncomfortable because of personlity conflicts. Others are obviously fake whereas some are the think-too-much kind. But I guess for me, it just boils down to one word: trust. I see people around me ganging up into huge big cliques, others jumping from one clique to another wanting the best of both worlds. It makes me wonder if it is necessary. I feel that they are making use of one another to make up the numbers and thereby feeling powerful in a sense. And then there's another problem. How come whenever there is competition, friendship somehow seems to sacrifice. It's kinda sad, but I guess its a reality. Personally the furthest I would go is to protect my own interest, whilst ensuring that I do not harm you in anyway. I guess it's just a personal decision that I wouldn't work with people I know that would make my life miserable whether or not you are my "friend". Cause if you freeload off me, obviously you not someone that I would miss. So complicated. Hopefully this friend accepted my stand and explanation. It's my final year already, I really don't wish to fight and get pissed with working who doesn't put in effort. Even this summer prog also giving me headache with someone ended up crying. Strained relationship. Hopefully in Vietnam and whilst doing report no volcano eruption.
Ange
1:38 pm
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